You have already been on a few dates with a specific guy and you know that there is a real spark between the two of you. You know that you have some serious chemistry. You are already pondering the idea of becoming official with him but you’re not so sure if you should be making that jump just yet.
There’s something that seems to be stopping you and holding you back. Maybe it’s because you were hurt in past relationships. Maybe you’re just hesitant because it’s been quite a while since your last relationship. Perhaps every experience that you’ve had with love has been terrible and you’re scared that it’s all going to be the same.
So all of your negative experiences are now preventing you from taking a chance on someone new. You don’t want to dive into anything because of your past experiences. You are constantly doubting what you have because you just can’t seem to silence your insecurities.
You’re wondering if the two of you are really compatible or not. What if you end up becoming official only to find out that you’re not meant for each other after all? What if your love won’t be enough to sustain your relationship in the long run? You are practically getting in your own head with this relationship and you are talking yourself out of it. You’re essentially talking the relationship down even when it hasn’t even started yet.
Just relax. You don’t have to assume that everything is going to be all bad right away. If you have a great guy with you and you think that you have a shot at making things work, then you should be willing to take your chances. However, there are a few things that you need to keep in mind before you take things to the next level.
All of that starts with you making sure that you stay true and genuine to who you really are. You should never change your essence in favor of a man. For more information on the rules that you need to be keeping in mind, then just read on:
1. Know that your relationship history will not define your future.
Sure, you have had your past attempts at love. But you shouldn’t let these ultimately define your future. You have to know that your past relationships helped shape who you are now. But that doesn’t mean that they’re going to define who you’re going to become. In fact, it might even be an advantage that you have so much experience in relationships – just so you know what mistakes you need to avoid in the future.
2. Always uphold your independence.
A smart girl always upholds her independence. Sure, you are getting into a relationship with a man. And yes, you are going to make a few adjustments, sacrifices, and compromises here and there. Your life is no longer ENTIRELY your own anymore. You have to be willing to share some parts of it with someone else. But that doesn’t mean that you have to give up your sense of individuality and independence.
3. Keep in mind that there’s nothing wrong with being single.
You should never be forcing yourself into a relationship. You should never be so desperate to be in a relationship to the point that you force the issue. You need to learn to embrace being single. Otherwise, you will never have the temperament to make a relationship work. A smart girl knows that she doesn’t need to be in a relationship for her to feel happy or fulfilled.
4. Don’t dwell on the small and insignificant things.
It’s always nice when you have great attention to detail in your relationships. That is always a good thing. It shows that you really don’t take your relationship for granted and that you find value in even the simplest things. However, that doesn’t mean you should be overly critical of your partner either. You shouldn’t be talking yourself out of relationships just because there are some minor annoyances that take place. Always remember to keep the big picture in mind. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
5. Don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve.
You should never be so desperate to be in a relationship to the point that you start settling for things that are beneath you. It’s okay to “settle” to a certain extent especially when your expectations are just far too unreasonable. However, you shouldn’t be settling to the point where you are actually losing your dignity.
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6. Make sure that you love yourself first.
Always make sure that you practice self-love first and foremost. That is the most important thing for you to have at this moment regardless if you are in a relationship or not. When you learn to love yourself, then you teach other people how to love you in the right manner.