You might be the girl who is waiting around for the phone to ring in the hopes that your ex is telling you that he wants to get back together. You might still have your hopes up. You still cling to the belief that he’s somehow going to make his way back to you and try to make things right with you. Your mind might be spinning right now trying to rationalize everything that has just happened. You once thought that your relationship was one that could never fail; one that was perfect. But alas, you were wrong. And you’re trying to figure out at this moment just where you went wrong in the first place.
And sometimes, your mind can come into a form of desperation as you try to rationalize everything. In that desperation, you might end up lying to yourself. And the thing about lies is that while they can comfort you at first, they can do more harm than good. Lies can be very toxic and they can deprive you of the lessons and the perspectives that you need to have to find closure in your situation. Yes, you might be scared right now. But you’re going to have to come face to face with your fears if you’re ever going to get around conquering them. Think of your lies as added weights that keep you from being to where you need to be. If you find that you are telling yourself these lies, then you need to check yourself and come clean with the truth.
1. Sex was probably to blame for everything.
If sex was the reason that your partner left in the first place, then you don’t deserve to be with a guy like that at all. A relationship should be about more than just sex. And even though sex can contribute to the problems in a relationship, it should never be the sole reason for someone leaving.
2. Your friends and family will judge you for not being able to make things work.
Here’s the cold hard truth: yes, there will be some people out there who will judge you for the way that your relationship turned out. But here’s another truth for you: a lot of these people don’t actually matter. Those who are closest to you and those who really care about you would never judge you.
3. You probably ruined all your chances at finding love.
You ALWAYS have a chance at finding love in this life. Love isn’t something that once you miss out on, you will never get the chance for it again. Love is something that we are all constantly looking for in this life. Love is something that we call to strive for and build on once we do have it.
4. You need to immediately rush into feeling better again.
You should NEVER have to rush into feeling better again. You might have been exposed to people who didn’t really take too much time to get better again after a breakup. However, we all heal at our own individual paces. You should always take your own time to heal at your own pace.
5. You are alone in trying to recover from this.
You are NEVER alone. Yes, you might feel like you’ve just lost the love of your life. However, that doesn’t mean that you don’t have people out there who don’t love you. There are always going to be those people who love you and they’re going to help you through this difficult phase of your life.
6. You are now bound for a life of unhappiness.
You might be feeling unhappy at this moment and you should never invalidate those feelings. You should accept the fact that you are sad and come to terms with it. However, you should also know that your unhappiness isn’t going to stay forever. You are eventually going to be okay again. So just cling to that faith.
7. You let go of something perfect.
No. It wasn’t perfect. And that’s precisely why things didn’t last between the two of you. You can’t just always be thinking about everything that made you feel happy and good in the relationship. Take a step back and be honest about the real state of your relationship. Come to terms with the fact that your relationship was far from perfect.
8. You’re never going to be okay ever again.
You are going to be okay someday and you have to believe that. You might feel like you’re completely broken at this moment. You might feel like things are never going to get better for you. You might feel like this has left you scarred for life. But it hasn’t. You are going to be okay again. You’re going to be just fine.